USA, 2004
Director: Mel Gibson
Cast: Jim Caviezel, Monica Bellucci

I really don’t know how to review this.

After watching it, I have so many mixed emotions. Part of me wants to go out and make the world a better place where an injustice like this will never happen again, but then there’s another part that knows I have to get up in the morning and go back to work and be in the real world where there’s no time for all that.

I know that I’m going to have to go back out into the world where so-called Christians are going to curse me, scream at me or act like I’m the anti-Christ because we’re sold out of tickets for this movie.  I know that there are going to be people walking out of this hating Jews more than ever. I know that there are going to be those that leave learning nothing.

And I guess that’s what saddens me most about this film—the entire “well-meaning” audience. But you know, I don’t want to talk about that. I don’t want to talk about the audiences who have acted decidedly un-Christian at the theater or even about my own personal disillusion with religion on whole. I want to talk about the film itself.

I put aside the cynicism. Put aside the hatred that modern Christians have instilled in us and turned many of you against religion. Put aside all the prejudices and pre-conceived notions that we may have about this film.

You have to.

The Passion of the Christ is a beautiful, brutal epic that may go down as one of the greatest films ever made. And I say this not as a Christian (I am actually a non-practicing bad Catholic), but as a film critic and a film lover. But even more than that, I say that as a human who has witnessed far too much injustice and evil in his own life—so much that, like so many of my generation, that I have become practically desensitized to it—yet as I watched the film, I was reduced to tears throughout the whole thing.

Gone is the clean-cut Aryan Jesus of the ’50’s, with only one drop of blood dripping down is forehead—we’re now shown a realistic Jesus, cut to shreds and beaten beyond recognition. A Jesus that is actually fearful of his future. A Jesus that is more human than any film has ever dared to portray him (with the minor exception of The Last Temptation of Christ).

Chronicling the final hours of Jesus Christ, The Passion is a stark, atmospheric, lush retelling, but in no way a retread of previous versions. Mel Gibson has created a visceral, bloody world where you feel every sting of the whip and every barb of the thorn. Every inch of the screen fills with images that you can’t shake out of your head—from the whips with hooks that rips out flesh to the demons that taunt Judas—it’s a nightmarish visage that needs to be seen, not because it’s saying that you should believe this or you should practice that, but because it’s the ultimate story, the ultimate dissertation of man’s cruelty to man—one that goes on today, whether we like it or not.

In a lot of ways, its message reminds me of another powerful film, Schindler’s List. Like that film was about a man trying to save those from the madness around him, The Passion uses Jesus basically as a case study in redemption and hope. And while that may dissuade many modern Christians who want the film to be simpler than that, I feel that that makes the message of the film—a plea for tolerance, understanding and forgiveness—only more universal.

James Caviezel’s Christ is subdued and barely speaks. He doesn’t need to—I’ve never seen an actor convey so much with just a few facial expressions. The same goes for Maia Morgenstern, who’s Mary is one of the best portrayed roles I have ever seen on film. Like Caviezel’s, her role is mainly one of looks and expressions, but I have never seen someone with so much pain in their face as when she’s witnessing her son carrying the cross to it’s final resting place.  Monica Bellucci, as Mary Magdalene, is understated perfection. Particularity moving is the flashback where Jesus saved her from being stoned by Pharisees—once again, no words, just images and expressions, yet they all say so much.

The decision to have the dialogue entirely in Aramaic and Latin is brilliantly inspired and only add to it’s air of authenticity. I know many of you hate subtitles, but there is so little dialogue, you tend to forget they’re even there.

As for the controversy as to whether the film is anti-Semitic or not: the Jewish priests who condemn Christ are not representative of Jewish people on whole as many have claimed—they are more representative of all religious leaders who defile the beliefs of their congregation though underhanded means, from Catholic priests who cover up molestations to televangelists that steal the money of the elderly for their own wealth. It is indictive of all of us who have ever looked the other way whenever we knew a grave injustice was occurring and decided it was none of our business. Instead of focusing on who it’s offending, people need to focus on themselves and ask themselves if they are living the best possible life they can.

The Passion doesn’t preach. It doesn’t try to convert. It may sicken you, disgust you, shock you or make you want to change your life. Everyone will come away with something different.

It won’t entertain you.

It won’t be the feel good hit of the year.

But I dare anyone to leave this film unmoved.

Review by Louis Fowler.

Quick! What was the first martial-arts movie to unspool across American cinemas? Five Fingers of Death? Fists of Fury? Nope! ‘Twas 1961’s no-budget, black-and-white oddity Karate: Hand of Death.

In it, a Yank named Matthew (Joel Holt) is vacationing in Japan when he mysteriously comes into possession of a coin owned by a former Nazi who was murdered via karate chop the previous night. Because said coin contains hidden secrets surrounding the dead man’s fortune, bad guys come out of the woodwork to prey on Matthew; the one pestering him the most is Ivan Mayberry, a near-seven-feet tall homosexual who talks like Mr. Belvedere and smokes all of Matthew’s cigarettes.

Luckily, Matt is skilled in the fine art of karate – black-belt style! Or so says the script. He’s got scars on his knuckles and we see him break a couple of boards, but he doesn’t hit much beyond a teapot, which he assaults in a rage in his hotel room, hilariously. He also stops a taxi cab in its tracks and
kills a man simply with a bale of hay, but I don’t think you need a black belt to do that. When Matt fully busts out his kung fu in the to-the-death finale, it’s still so stilted and awkward, it’s like watching Ward Cleaver.

The film’s middle is an extended lesson in the sport of karate, during which Ivan won’t stop asking annoying questions (“Why do those chappies have their fingers extended like this?”). Karate sure doesn’t work as a straightforward action film, because it’s largely in a state of inertia, but it works well as a comedy.

As fun as it is, though, this is one of the rare cases of a DVD where the bonus features outweigh the actual feature. Something Weird has packed the disc full of old-school kung-fu trailers from the genre’s ‘70s heyday, in what it calls The Incredible Martial-Arts-Mayhem Kung-Fu Trailer Show.

There are a resplendent 50 previews in all, most of which were seen on the company’s two Martial Arts Mayhem tapes from the late ‘90s. Several superstars of the genre are represented in these coming attractions, including Jackie Chan (Snake Fist Fighter), Bolo Yeung (Chinese Hercules), Jimmy Wang Yu (Master of the Flying Guillotine), Sonny Chiba (The Street Fighter) and Chuck Norris (Slaughter in San Francisco). There’s no Bruce Lee, but plenty of his laughable clones.

A few of these three-minute bites can’t possibly live up to their titles (The Sacred Knives of Vengenance or Slash – The Blade of Death!), while others sport some hardcore concepts that have me thirsting to see the whole thing. Included in this camp are the booby traps a’plenty of Masters of the Iron Arena, the swords-for-rungs ladder of Tower of the Drunken Dragon, The Karate Killer’s deadly hair and the snake-***censored***-goes-crazy plot of Devil Woman.

But best of all are the numerous, head-scratching title cards and ad taglines which seem lost in translation. Some highlights:
• Temple of Death: “FATAL FIGHTING, HUMEROUS” and “WELL GUARANTEE”
• Deadly Strike: “STRON CASTING! NEW STRIKES! RISKS EVERYWHERE!”
• Superfist: “FUGITIVE? DRUG TRAFFICKER? ASSASSINATION! REVENGE!”
• Hammerfist Masters: “Featuring the Charming Lady”
• The Mad, the Mean, and the Deadly: “Furious Fighting That Startle Everybody!”
• Dragons Never Die: “Take your mama to see it before somebody else does!”
• Fury of the Black Belt: “MOVABLE SIGHT IN EVERY SECOND! THE FEELING OF PRESSURE! CARRY OUT FORCE! THE QUESTION OF LOWS! IT IS AN EXPLOSIVE FILM!”

The combination of a wholly obscure martial arts B-movie with hours of fun-filled trailers make this DVD irresistible, and I hope Something Weird continues to release more of the same.

Review by Rod Lott.

Hong Kong, 2001
Director: Tsui Hark
Starring: Ekin Cheng, Cecilia Cheung, Zhang Ziyi, Sammo Hung

The Zu Mountain stands by itself in another world. When the evil Insomnia slowly starts to move along and destroy everything that stands in his way, only one clan has the power to stop this war lord. Omei, with the support of Zu’s toughest warriors, the Omei Clan will risk their lives to bring back the peace of the Zu Mountains.

This film wants to be an epic so bad that it overwhelms and overpowers everything. Tsui Hark is relying on computer generated special effects and environments rather than narrative and character development. The result is that the film is trying way too hard to be intense in every moment and even too artistic.  It is somehow just nonsense to watch after a while. The film contains way too many characters that are portrayed by the stars (Ekin Cheng, Cecilia Cheung and Zhang Ziyi to name a few). It’s very disappointing that the film doesn’t have room for most of them.

Action sequences are choreographed by the master Yuen Woo-Ping. But most of the martial arts sequences in this film depend on the use of CGI to show their powers and their weapons.

This is his re-visit, upgrade version of his film Zu: Warriors from the Magic Mountain. This again has the re-visitation curse all over it. Did Lucas put him up to this? I don’t know. He tried to do what he did with the original, to break all the rules and give us a spectacular fantasy film.  He failed. Maybe he should re-visit this film again in twenty years from now and see if he can make it even worse.

Review by Shogo.

Canada, 2003
Director: Charles Martin Smith
Cast: Barry Pepper, Annabella Piugattuk
Score: ***

The Snow Walker is a man versus nature tale featuring northern arctic landscapes, with luscious effects which include swarms of mosquitoes descending from a blackened sky, torrential rains and close-ups of seldom seen creatures like the white owl and arctic squirrel.  Shot on location in areas north of Churchill, Manitoba to stand for the Canadian arctic, the film concerns a brash bush pilot Charlie Halliday (Barry Pepper, the sniper from Saving Private Ryan), a ladies man and war veteran, stranded with a sickly Inuit girl, Kanaalaq (Annabella Piugattuk) after his plane crashes down hundred of miles from civilization on the rugged and barren arctic tundra.  Taken as dead by the plane charter company, Charlie and Kanaalaq eventually journey in the direction of an Inuit village as winter approaches and the ground turns into ice and snow.

Based on Farley Mowat’s (Never Cry Wolf) short story, Walk Well My Brother, The Snow Walker offers ample opportunities for adventure, clash of cultures, triumph of the human spirit over nature’s unforgiving elements and perhaps a little romance.  Writer and director Smith clearly has his heart with the local Inuits.  The white man is portrayed as indecisive, impetuous and impulsive while the Inuits are stable, intuitive and sacrificing.  Having his training with Disney – Never Cry Wolf was a Disney film and Martin went on to also direct Air Bud – it is not surprising that his new film follows in the same footsteps.  The strongest words in the script are ‘son of a ***censored***’ and the film’s family-friendly feel prevents it from having the strength and raw energy of say, the recent disaster film Touching the Void or the recent Inuit movie Atanajuart, the Fast Runner.

The film is captivating and earnest enough, with sufficient frictional interplay between the lead and the girl with an arduous journey just scary enough for a whole family to view.  Still, one only wishes that she would learn from him as much as he from her or that the film contained more gruesome scenes to more realistically evoke the horror of being stranded in the far north.

Review by Gilbert Seah

USA 2004
Director: Jay Chandrasekhar
Score: ***

Broken Lizard is a comedy group comprised of director Jay Chandrasekhar, Kevin Heffernan, Steve Lemme, Paul Soter and Erik Stolkanske.  Their first outing, the 2001 Super Troopers proved that placing oneself in an infantile state of mind allows one to enjoy certain hilarity in all the group’s silliness.  But at least there are no fart, puke or ***censored*** jokes.

Broken Lizard’s new venture is Pleasure Island, where vacationers visit, cut off from all connections to the outside world.  Which is all perfectly fine unless some killer maniac is let loose and starts doing away with the club organizers (played by Broken Lizard).  That is as far as the storyline goes.

Bill Paxton, who takes over the celebrity role from straight actor Brian Cox in Super Troopers provides more hamming up than laughs.  The troupe, playing roles like Dave: DJ and drugs, Sam: Fun Police get their bit in for the fun. The takes on slasher movies (the numerous false alarms; the stupid having sex being the first to go; no matter where you run, the killer always appears and finally the slasher having to be killed at least three times) are taken to the hilt.

Broken Lizard reminds one of the old British—Carry On series.  The Carry On films were crude, silly, not particularly funny nor well made but a new one pops up every year.  And I have seen every single one of them.

Review by Gilbert Seah.