CHERI (UK/France/Germany 2009) **
Directed by Stephen Frears

CHERI is the type of French period piece where all the actors speak English, wear wigs and white make-up and carry on in costumes amidst lush sets as if credibility to the audience never matters.

A romantic drama and a very bad one at that, set in 1920s Paris and actually shot in Paris and Cologne, CHERI tells of the love affair between an older courtesan Lea de Lonval (Michelle Pfeiffer) and the younger son, Cheri (Rupert Friend) of her friend, another courtesan, Madame Peloux (Kathy Bates).  But besides the relationship that is doomed, the film is from start to finish.  It is hardly believable that CHERI is the combined effort of such talents as Oscar winning scriptwriter Christopher Hampton (DANGEROUS LIASONS, CARRINGTON and ATONEMENT) and director Stephen Frears (MY BEAUTIFUL LAUNDRETTE, DIRTY PRETTY THINGS and the recent THE QUEEN).

Besides ones skin crawling with the English spoken in the French setting, the script does not make one care for its two principal characters.  Both Cheri and Lea are annoying, spoilt rich socialites that have no redeeming qualities.  They do no good, though Cheri claims many times over in the film that she is a good woman.  These things must be demonstrated not just said.  What Lea sees in Cheri and vice versa is beyond comprehension.

Pfieffer looks pathetic in her role.  In one of the film’s most important scenes where she is required to seduce the just married Cheri, her wardrobe (sleeveless) is just all wrong, emphasizing her scrawny features.  Friend, best remembered as the evil Lieutenant Koler in THE BOY IN THE STRIPED PYJAMAS, is all good-looking but never given a chance to show his talent.  Most of the blame lies in the bland script that contains lines like: “I could not go on without you” and “You have no idea what my life has been without you.” But the most appalling is the voiceover that constantly drums into the audience’s ears how the characters should be feeling or what is happening on screen.

The confrontation scene between Cheri and Lea near the end is this year’s best example of bad acting.  With the film running less than 90 minutes, director Frears must have called it quits.